On the Goats of Y’Herd Me Property Maintenance (Dark Rye [Whole Foods]. July 2014).

Chauncey no longer works for us. By now he is too old. He has retired. He lives out back of our house in New Orleans, puttering about alone, eating beaucoup fresh grass and fallen plums.

At 12 years old, he’s too slow and lazy to really keep up with the grass and weeds on our modest double lot. Luckily, my wife Morgana King just got nine more goats with whom she’s started an incorporated lawn maintenance company.

Efficiency-obsessed corporations such as Google and Amazon have used goats as unpaid interns that manicure their vast, beautiful campuses. Texas uses goats to clear away brush that might otherwise turn into wildfires. Goats are especially popular as groundskeepers in California, where steep hills, deep crevices and rocky topography impede traditional gas mowers.

New Orleans, though, is famously flat. “But it’s an ideal city for this business model because the blight has gotten pretty bad since Katrina,” states Morgana’s business plan. “Even in the nicest New Orleans neighborhoods, abandoned houses just sit there for years being swallowed up by tall grass and vines … post-Katrina New Orleans needs goats.” CLICK HERE to read the rest of the piece at Whole Foods’ magazine Dark Rye…

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